Algo esta cambiando...

Lately I have noticed that my relationship with Sofia is changing ... and I don't like the change. Basically she has been driving me crazy on and off, day after day. She doesn't listen when you ask her to do - or stop doing - something, and when you scold her she either gives you a lame excuse like "I forgot", or "I didn't hear you", or starts crying right away.

The thing is that I don't think she is doing it on purpose. If feels like she is in her own little world and really can't help herself. It is not like we are talking big offenses, but her lack of attention drives you crazy all the same.

The part I dislike the most is that her lack of attention brings "mean mom" out of me. Today, for instance, I told her to be careful not to spill water outside the bath tub. And as soon as I said that, guess exactly what she did? So of course I told her that if she kept it up I was not going to help her anymore, and she would have to figure out how to take a shower, dry her hair, and get ready all by herself.

The other day I asked her twice to please go downstairs to get my phone but she flat out ignored me and just stayed sitting there. Couple minutes later she told me she needed help looking for her summer camp shirt, since she needed it for her field trip. I told her I was not going to help her because she did not help me, and she could not expect people to be nice to her if she couldn't reciprocate. This did not make me feel good at all, because moms should always be willing to help. Besides, I don't want her to feel like I don't love her, and I am not there for her. But I have feelings too, and although I am patient with both the girls I can't always look the other way when they misbehave.

I hope this is just a stage, and soon she starts to behave better at home. I sure would love to have a few more years of my sweet little girl before the teenager years. God only knows how much frustration and heart ache they will bring.

Flashback

Today Bella was channeling her inner 80s child thanks to a t-shirt grandma gave her and a crooked ponytail one of her teachers gave her because she kept moving when they were trying to fix her hair.

Different Strokes

It is well known to us that Bella and Sofia are very different, and have been since day one. Sofia is very much the sensitive one, and Bella? Well, Bella just wants to have fun.

Me: Sofia, what was your favorite part of the day?
Sofia: When you came to pick me up
Bella: Ask me mami, ask me
Me: Bella, what was your favorite part of the day?
Bella: When I played with my friends

6 going on 16

Me: Sofia, where are you?
Sofia: ---------
Me: Sofia, where are you?
Sofia: ---------
Me: Sofia, where are you?
Sofia: I am upstairs...
Me: What are you doing?
Sofia: I am doing something...

Llorar y Llorar

Tonight Sofia made Lionel mad. As usual she was not listening, so it got to the point when he simply walked away from her. Turns out, that made her really sad. Even though we tried and tried to calm her down, and I even stayed with her in bed for a little while, she almost cried for an hour and a half before she finally fell asleep. That made us very sad, but I guess she just needed to cry it out.

The best years

I was born and raised in Mexico, and even though it's been 13 years since I moved away, I have great memories of my country, and growing up there.

But, turns out, I was probably lucky to leave when I did. Based on the stories I hear, working in Mexico - as a woman -  is still less than ideal. If you add to that all the insecurity nowadays, I am sad to say that at this point, I hesitate to even go visit.

Babus

This past weekend we had a special visitor, my good friend Agustina from college. We worked together the summer of 1997, at the international programs office, and we were tight until we finished school and I moved away.

Another good friend used to call us Babis (me) and Babus (her), and after all these years we still used those nicknames when talking to each other. Doing so just felt natural.

She contacted me about 2 weeks ago to let me know she was living in Michigan, because her company sent her there for a project. So we quickly made plans for her to come visit. She arrived Friday afternoon and left on Sunday around noon, and even though it was a very quick visit we had a great time reconnecting and learning about our lives for the past few years. And I loved that she got to meet my girls for the very first time.

I was sad to see her go back home, but I am happy that she will be back in a month for Gabi’s baby shower. That should be fun!

The drop off

I seriously need to ask Lionel to start taking the girls to school. They always take forever getting ready which frustrates me, and I become mean impatient mom. Then, at daycare I invariably run into this one mom that gives me dirty looks, and by the time I get to work it is between 9:30 and 10:00am. And that is no way to start anybody's day.

3 Showers

The weather in Cincinnati was so hot again during the weekend, that on Saturday morning Lionel said: "This is going to be a 3 shower day".

Later in the day, when it started raining, Sofia said: "Daddy was right, it was supposed to rain today", to which I responded "Daddy said that?"

"Yes", said Sofia. "He said there were going to be 3 showers today!"

Child Speak

Even though Sofia speaks really well by now she still says things that are grammatically incorrect, but that her child logic tell her it's ok.

"Mami, having 5 blisters is WORSER than having 1"

"Mami, I CATCHED the ball"

"When I am BELTED in the car" ... (aka When I have my seat belt on)

Sweet moment

This afternoon I went to my sister's house to help her finalize her baby registry. I was literally gone for about an hour and a half.  I then met Lionel and the girls directly at their swim lesson. After Bella's class, while I was getting her dressed, she told me: "Mami, I missed you". It was soooo sweet.

Our loves

While Sofia and I were in California, Lionel and Bella were hanging out with tia and tio. This is a cute picture of the two of them at tio and tia's house.

Gorda Tenebrosa

One of Bella's nicknames is "Gorda Tenebrosa". We even have a little song that we sing for her all the time. I sing "Gorda, Gorda, Gorda Tene..." and she then completes the sentence with "...brosa".

Today Sofia decided to come up with some choreography, and Bella decided to follow along.

Bella's First Swim Lesson

Today, at 2 1/2 years old, Bella had her first swim lesson ever. Even though she has seen Sofia's teacher many times, I wasn't sure how she was going to react. Turns out, she did a great job. She didn't cry, she didn't whine, and in fact enjoyed her time in the water while Sofia - as the good sister she is - hovered close to her.

After her class, while I was dressing her, she told me: "Mami, I did awesome!". She heard her teacher said that, and of course she took it to heart.

Bella and Nancy

Bella's sticker after her swim lesson

Bella's Summer

Every day we receive a daily from daycare where the teachers write the activities the kids did that day and also include a special message for each one of them. I love reading those because even though I don't get to spend the day with Bella, knowing what she did makes me feel close to her.

Here is a quick compilation of some of Bella's special messages for this month.

Girl Club

Girl Club. Do you want to be in my girl club? Love, Sofia

English Tea Party

Today I went to an English tea themed wedding shower. We were supposed to wear a hat, so my co-workers and I had fun with it.

Photo Crazy

When we were in California Sofia had plenty of fun taking pictures of herself with my camera, my blackberry, and my iPhone. She mostly took the same picture over, and over, and over…

Ratatouille

Our gift to Lionel, from our Disney trip.

Just Hilarious

Please tell me you find the humor in the picture below...

Oblivious

Lionel did not water this plant while I was gone, and when I pointed it out he told me he did NOT know he needed to water it because I did not tell him so.

Candy Cane Inn

During our trip to California Lulu, Mara, Sofia and I stayed at a place called Candy Cane Inn. I had never heard of it, but I came across it as I was checking trip advisor looking for a hotel. It had the second best customer rating based on several hundred reviews. I must admit that the name did not make me want to stay there, so I looked at other places as well and read many, many reviews. The place that had the top rating also looked good but I waited too long and it got sold out, so at the end I made the reservation at the Candy Cane Inn.


I am happy to report that, although not perfect, I also have to give it a pretty good review. On the con side, although it does sleep four, the room feels somewhat crowded with more than 2 adults. And the fact that the building setup is that of a motel felt kind of odd to me because I am used to the standard hotels. On the pro side it was clean and quiet, had beautiful flowers, and when we were inside the property it didn't even feel like we were in a busy boulevard. I also liked the free shuttle service to Disneyland. The driver was nice and courteous, and it was always on time. They also offer continental breakfast from 7 to 9:00am, and even though couple times we went down almost at nine, there was still plenty of food to be had. Having breakfast by the pool had to be the icing on the cake. Another pro is that our room had its own safe, just like bigger hotels. Right next door there is a small mart where you can get basic personal stuff you may have forgotten back home. They also have a baby pool, and a hot tub that is perfect after a full day of walking around. And did I mention that parking is free as well?

As I think about the pros and cons of the Candy Cane Inn, I clearly see that the pros far outweigh the cons. If next year we decide to go back to Anaheim I would definitely like to stay there again. And maybe, if they are nice, this time we'll take Lionel and Bella with us.

California girls

Sofia and I spent the last three days away from home on a trip to Orange county -Southern California - where neither one of us had been before. Once there we met Lulu, my best friend from high school, and one of her friends.


This was the very first time we went on a trip together without Bella and Lionel and, although we really missed them, we also had plenty of fun. With Wednesday and today spent traveling, that really only left us with Thursday and Friday to explore. We could have chosen to stay one more day and head back home on Sunday instead of today, but since Bella was staying behind I didn't want to be away for too long.

On Thursday we went to Disneyland, which of course was crowded but it wasn't too bad. I had never been to one of the Disney parks as that was not a luxury my sister and I had as kids and, truth be told, if anything Lionel and I had been dreading the time when we would have to take the girls there. Sofia of course loved it, and I was pleasantly surprised that I also had a pretty good time. Seeing Sofia happy made me happy in itself and it was nice to -for once - give her all my attention and be there just for her. Also, despite the;” crowds and the heat, all the people we interacted with were very nice. We were there between 10:30am and 4:30pm before Sofia finally needed a break. We then headed back to the hotel, to buy her a swimsuit - since I had forgotten hers - and to the pool. After all that I thought she would be done for the day, but she decided she wanted to go back to the park. By the time we took showers and made it back the fireworks were about to start. So we ate something in a hurry and went to enjoy the show. It truly was a lovely way to end the night, sitting there under the stars and holding on to my little girl. By the time the fireworks ended Sofia was finally exhausted, so as soon as we made it back to the hotel she crashed fast and hard.

On Friday we decided to head to LA since I had rented a car and neither one of us had ever been there. There was definitely traffic and we hit some really slow spots at times, but overall it wasn't too bad. Sofia and Mara - Lulu's friend - were in the back seat, so they took a nap. Lulu and I used that time to reconnect, talk about the people from the past, and share some of our future plans. Once we arrived in LA we parked the car in Hollywood boulevard, had some quick pizza, and visited the Kodak and the Chinese theaters before buying tickets for one of those tours that take you all around. We wanted one where we could get in and out. Our first stop was at the famous Chateau Marmont, which we found to be highly disappointing. The people working there, most of who spoke perfect Spanish and appeared to be mostly Mexican, let us in to check out the pool and the gardens. It is not that it isn't somewhat nice, but I just don't see why people would pay thousands of dollars to spend the night. If you ask me I have stayed at nicer places, for way less than that. We then boarded the sightseeing bus again, which drove us around Sunset and Santa Monica Boulevards before making its way to Beverly Hills. By the time we made it to Rode Drive we left the bus again to walk around. There we made an unexpected purchase at a kids shoe store as Sofia's plastic shoes were bugging her, so I had to buy her tennis shoes and socks. This made me think a lot about my sister, as she has been known to do things like that. But I couldn't complain too much about it, as in part it was my own fault. I told her to wear the tennis shoes, but I should have made her do so. Other than that of course we had no plans to buy anything there, but it was a nice walk on a beautiful sunny day. One of the side streets was all cobblestones, which made you feel like you were in Mexico or somewhere in Europe, but not in LA.

After our stop in Rodeo Drive we once again took the bus to take us back to where we started. Since we had no plans to get out at any of the other stops the ride back did seem like forever, and by then I could see that Sofia was starting to crash. But sitting there actually gave her some more energy. So when we made it back to Hollywood boulevard we made a quick stop at the wax museum, which I thought was somewhat disappointing as well. Some of the people did look like the real thing, but some of them were not and appeared cheaply made. At least I was glad the ticket was not that pricey, as by then we had already spent plenty of cash.

By then it was 8:00pm and it was starting to get dark, and I really wanted to leave before that as according to me Hollywood Boulevard at night is not the best place around. So we made it to the car for our drive back to Anaheim. One more stop for dinner and we were finally back at the hotel around 10:30pm. We made time for a quick shower and it was time for bed.

This morning we had to get up at 6:00am to catch our first flight, and despite only sleeping 7 hours Sofia is still being a trooper, in a good mood, and acting like a big girl. She has been so great during the entire trip that it really makes me realize how much she has grown, how independent she is with so many things, and how lucky I am to be able to spend this time with her. I love my girl, and can't wait to do it all again.

Hollywood Boulevard

Chinese Theater

Chateau Marmont

Rodeo Drive

Rodeo Drive

A rare moment of silence

Wax Museum

Last picture before we left LA

Ahorcado

When Gabi and I were kids, we used to play a words guessing game named "Ahorcado". I hadn't thought about it in a very long time, but today I rediscovered it as Sofia and I were browsing a store at the airport. I learned that in English it is called the exact same thing: "Hangman" and that in fact Sofia has played it at summer camp. If I think too much about it, the name and overall concept are just wrong, as a hanging has nothing fun about it. But luckily when you are a kid you don't think too much about that stuff. We got the game, and Sofia and I had fun for a little while on our first flight and while waiting for the second one. For the most part I let her win by picking easy words and by giving her a lot of clues, which helped to review words and to make her feel good by unleashing her competitive side.

Loca

The other day, right after dinner, Bella was being silly. I don't remember exactly if she was singing, dancing, or jumping, but she was definitely laughing when all of a sudden she said in between laughs: "Mami, I am loca".

Cincinnati

Many of the people I went to college with are scattered all over the world. Some were temporarily relocated by their companies, and others - like me - left the country to get an advanced degree and never went back. Regardless of the reason, I know classmates who are in Spain, Germany, Australia, Canada, and all over the US.

Sometimes -when I think about this-I feel somewhat cheated for having landed in Cincinnati, since there are many more exciting cities out there. Why couldn't I have ended up in Chicago, New York, or Vancouver like some of them? This of course is very ungrateful of me, as Cincinnati has been extremely good to me. And even though all those other cities are exciting and popular, the truth is that it can also be tough to live there. Maybe if I had landed there I would have been disappointed at the high cost of living, the weather, or the lack of green space. Or maybe I would have loved it for a little while, until it was time to get settled and start a family. I guess I’ll never know. And that is the difficult part, that you can't do it and have it all.

Chicago

A few weeks back we decided that this weekend we would go to Chicago for a quick family getaway. Even though we are only five hours away I had only been here once, and it was just in passing. It was about 13 years ago, before I moved to Cincinnati, and I didn't even spend the night. So needless to say, this visit was way overdue.

My family has a history with this town, since my parents lived here for three years in the early seventies, and my sister was born here before they decided that life in the big city and with long harsh winters just wasn't for them. Since they moved away thirty something years ago my parents have never been back. They have now lived in Cincinnati for five years and every summer we've talked about bringing them with us, but for one reason or another they have always declined.

We are now driving back home, but we had a great time. It really is a nice city, with something for everyone. And we have some funny stories, the kind that only come about when you get out of your routine, when you say "Yes" to something new without being stopped by the inconveniences of it all.

We wish my parents had come with us, but we also know parts of the trip would have been plain awful for them. We were happy they were not here on Saturday, when the weather was so hot and humid that you could barely breathe. Or when we had to wait for our rooms because somehow our reservation was nowhere to be found. They probably wouldn't have enjoyed it either when we walked around on Saturday night looking for a place to eat, only to come back to the restaurant at the hotel because everything was very crowed, with three hour waits. But above all, I think the worst moment for my mom would have been when the girls and I went to the bathroom of a small dive, after almost finishing our food, only to find a live cucaracha walking around. As for my dad, I think the waits and the crowds would have been his least favorite part.

On the other hand, I think they would have loved being back. After all, that was their home for a little while. They probably would have enjoyed seeing what has changed, and what - despite the decades - has remained intact. I think they would have loved the boat tour, which was very low key but allowed us to learn more about the city, enjoy the views, and took us to late Michigan. I thought a lot about them when we went to the Sears tower, apparently now officially called Willis tower, and the introduction video told us that construction on the tower was completed in 1973. My parents were still living in Chicago at the time, and I wondered if they knew about the tower, if it was a big deal for everybody in town, or if they were so busy going about their routine to even notice or care.

The girls had a bunch of firsts. They went on a boat for the first time, on a taxi for the first time, and obviously they were in Chicago for the very first time as well. Even though we were not here long enough to explore the city beyond walking around, they enjoyed getting out of the routine. And Sofia is now old enough to understand the concept of traveling, to learn fun facts about the places we visit, and to behave - for the most part.

All in all this weekend Chicago was nice to us. And what a better way to be grateful, than to plan to come back again.

Beautiful

Earlier today the girls and I were at a public restroom and as usual I chose the biggest stall so we could all go in at once. As we were all taking turns the girls were singing, dancing, and flat out being extremely loud. When we finally came out there was a lady washing her hands. She looked at us and smiled, and I smiled back also telling her: "Yes, that was us".

"Your girls are beautiful", she said.

"Thanks", I responded before Bella said right then and there: "Yes, we are beautiful".

"Wow. Did she really just said that?", I said laughing, but also feeling somewhat mortified at the obvious lack of modesty of the girl,

"They must hear it all the time", the lady finally responded before she left the place.