Countdown

Sofia has 2 days left at daycare. I have been counting down the days for a few weeks now. Not that I am looking forward to it; on the contrary. I can’t believe how fast these five years have gone by. We’ve been very fortunate to have found a daycare that we trust, that she always felt comfortable in, and that allowed us to have the peace to mind that our child was loved, and well taken care of while we were at work. I will miss the familiarity of it all, and having my two girls under the same roof when I am not with them.

Sofia is now going from a place that has 100 children at the most to one that has 600 at the very least. She has known for a while that this is coming. Her teachers have been preparing her and her classmates for it, and so have we. So she understands the concept. And she knows that come next Wednesday she is going to a new place, with a new teacher, new kids, and a whole new routine. Still, I am not quite sure how she is going to react when we take her there, and without much of an introduction, have to leave her alone, with all those new faces, the entire day. Or maybe I do know, and that is why I am dreading that day. If she stays crying, calling out our names, I know I will want to turn around, pick her up and tell her “Nevermind. Let’s go home. You don’t have to stay”. But I know I can’t. So even if she is screaming my name, I will just have to walk away.

But for now, back to daycare: When I picked the girls up today, one of Sofia’s teachers welcomed me with “The folder”. This is a compilation of art projects, photos, and things Sofia has said in her five years there. As you look at the content, you can tell the progress your child has made along the way, from barely being able to draw a line, to writing their full name. When she handed it to me, I literally felt my heart sink. It was like a time capsule. As if the folder contained all the memories, all the laughs, all the moments they have shared with my child while I was not there. It was also a reminder that regardless of how safe of a place it is for her, her time there has to come to an end. One of the teacher’s favorite’s quotes was: “Sometimes we have to remind Sofia that she is not the teacher, and as such, she can’t put her friends in timeout”. That definitely sounded like my girl. I can’t wait to go through the entire folder with her, and look at the pictures, and read the teacher’s notes as well. But I think I will wait for the weekend, when she is officially out of daycare. It will be our last time looking back, before we look forward and start preparing for what lies ahead.