The other day I heard or read somewhere that in general terms, even during difficult financial times, those who have the least are the ones that give the most. Even without hearing the explanation behind it, I wholeheartedly agreed with that. The reason given was that those that don't have much are empathetic, and are very aware that one day, at some point throughout their lives, that could be them.
My dad has always been that way. Ever since he was a child he never really had much, but always had a tendency to, whatever he had, want to share it with everybody else. Truth be told, in multiple occasions that created conflict with my mom, my sister and I. It simply felt to us like it was easy for him to see everybody else's pain, but had blinders to some of the needs inside his very own house. It's not like we went around hungry or not taken care of, but there were things we wanted that were not important to him. So growing up I always told myself I would give back, but I would never go to extreme. I know I have to be careful with that. After all, the apple does not fall far from the tree.
Lionel, on the other hand, doesn’t' have a charitable bone in him. He is not a bad person, and if you ask him for a donation he might say yes. He just doesn't regularly think about it; it doesn't come natural to him. I guess that is because he has never been face to face with a basic need that went unmet. His parents started without much, but his dad soon did really well at work. So for most of his life he never saw his parents go paycheck to paycheck. They lived in a nice big home, went on family vacations, he got a car when he was 16, and his decision on where to go to college did not depend on what his parents could afford. All he had to do was decide where he wanted to go ... and get admitted of course.
I think Lionel also tends to be less trustful than I am, and scrutinizes a lot more where his money is going, and the impact it will make. Sometimes I wonder, if Lionel wasn't t married to me, would he be donating at all? It's not like I blindly give money away. I do try to do my homework. But now and then, I also like to take a leap of faith. I am particularly weak for anything that has to do with children. After all, children shouldn't be punished by what their parents have or haven't been able to do with their lives. And if at the end of the day my help can only touch the lives of one or two children, so be it! That is one or two less needy children in the world.
Many times I have come to the conclusion that I tend to be more charitable because I feel guilty. Guilty because growing up I had two parents who loved me, a sister who was always there for me, and friends who, even without knowing it, showed me things I could aspire to, and helped me become the person I am today. But many people don't have that. And if it is hard to go through the world with everything that was given to me, how are the rest supposed to succeed?
I probably also feel guilty because I rarely volunteer my time. I know that I probably should, but I already spend so much time away from my family when I am at work. I basically wake up my children every morning only to get them ready and send them away to school. I then pick them up, spend couple hours with them, and all of a sudden it is time to go to bed. So if by the time the weekend came around I left them again, I would feel like I am abandoning them. And I am sure they would feel the same way. My children are little, and they need me, they need my company, they need me close to them.
So no, right now I don't really have time to spare, but I will still help wherever I can. As long as I have a job, on behalf of Lionel and myself, I will share the wealth. And as far as Lionel's charitable spirit, for all of our sakes, let's hope he never develops it the hard way.
No comments:
Post a Comment